Calm, practical steps to help your dog settle when you’re away
Leaving your dog with a sitter can feel like a big deal, even if it’s “only” for a long weekend.
Some dogs cope with change easily. Others find it harder. Rescue dogs, nervous dogs, and dogs who rely heavily on routine often need more preparation than people expect.
The good news is that most of the preparation is straightforward. It’s about choosing the right person, keeping things familiar, and doing a few short practice runs so your dog isn’t meeting a stranger on the day you walk out the door.
If you’re arranging care in Finchley, North Finchley, East Finchley, or Muswell Hill, this guide will help you plan it calmly and practically.
This guide may contain affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.
Choose the type of care that suits your dog
Before you even think about introductions, it helps to decide what kind of care is most likely to work for your dog.
In general, many pets find being moved into kennels or unfamiliar environments stressful, and for some dogs, it’s easier to stay at home with a sitter who keeps their routine.
For dogs that are sensitive, easily overwhelmed, or still settling in, staying at home often reduces the number of “new things” they have to cope with at once.
A simple way to decide:
- If your dog is calm, social, and likes new places, boarding may be fine.
- If your dog is nervous, reactive, older, or very routine-based, in-home care is often easier.
If you want to keep your dog at home while you’re away, then please take a look at my Stay-at-Home Pet Care
If you are still deciding which setup is right, this guide on whether a sitter is the better option may help.
Pick a sitter carefully
Your dog can’t read your calendar, but they’ll notice changes in the house straight away.
So your first job is not “get the dog used to it”. Your first job is to choose someone you trust, who will follow your routine and handle your dog calmly.
The RSPCA advises leaving clear care instructions, routines, and vet contact details when someone else is caring for your pet, and also notes that the person looking after your pet has a responsibility for your pet’s welfare while you’re away.
The PDSA also recommends conducting research, visiting the premises if you’re using boarding, and checking licensing where relevant, rather than relying solely on a website.
Even if you’re using an in-home sitter (not boarding), good questions still matter:
- Have they cared for dogs like yours before (shy, rescue, reactive, elderly)?
- Are they comfortable following a written routine rather than “making it up”?
- What do they do in an emergency?
- How do they handle dogs who refuse a walk, won’t eat, or get anxious at night?
- How often will they update you, and how (message, photo, short summary)?
If your dog is easy-going, most decent sitters will cope. If your dog has quirks, triggers, or nerves, you need someone who stays calm and doesn’t take behaviour personally.
Guide choosing a trusted dog sitter or boarder
Do a few short introductions before the real sit
The biggest mistake I see is leaving the first proper introduction until the day you go away.
A better plan is to treat the sitter like any other new person in your dog’s life: slow, predictable, and positive.
A simple intro schedule that works for many dogs:
- Visit 1: sitter comes in briefly, ignores the dog at first, lets the dog approach in their own time
- Visit 2: sitter repeats the same calm entry, then does a short routine task (fills water bowl, gives a pre-approved treat)
- Visit 3: sitter does a normal short walk or garden break if your dog is comfortable
- Visit 4 (optional): sitter stays longer while you’re in another room, so your dog learns “this person can be here and you still come back”
For nervous dogs, the “ignore first” approach often helps. A sitter who comes in making a fuss can overwhelm some dogs and make the whole thing harder.
If your dog is a rescue or you’re still building confidence outdoors, link this planning into your broader support:
Write the routine down and make it easy to follow
Even a good sitter can’t mind-read.
The simplest way to reduce stress is to write down what your dog’s day normally looks like and keep it as consistent as possible.
The RSPCA specifically recommends leaving details of your pet’s usual routine, food instructions, behaviour information, exercise needs, and vet and emergency contact details for whoever is caring for your pet.
The PDSA also highlights preparation steps such as ensuring the carer has vet contact details and clear instructions, and thinking ahead about medication and feeding routines if relevant.
I suggest a one-page routine sheet that covers:
- feeding times, amounts, and any “don’t feed” rules
- walking routine: time, length, and whether your dog prefers quiet routes
- where your dog sleeps and what helps them settle
- what your dog is worried by (other dogs, bikes, men in hats, door knocking)
- what to do if your dog won’t eat or won’t go out
- vet contact details and an emergency contact you trust
- your preferred emergency plan (for example, “call me, but if you can’t reach me, go to the vet”)
You may like my article on a staycation packing list for your dog
Quick checklist for common problems
| Hazard | Risk level | What to do |
|---|---|---|
| Sitter meets your dog for the first time on departure day | High | Do 2–3 short visits first, including one where you step out briefly. |
| Sitter changes routine or “improvises” | Medium to High | Provide a one-page routine sheet and keep instructions simple and clear. citeturn0search1 |
| Dog is under-exercised and becomes restless | Medium | Plan realistic walks that match your dog’s needs and your sitter’s ability. |
| Your dog is nervous with strangers indoors | High | Start with calm, low-pressure visits. No fuss. Let your dog choose distance. |
| No vet details or emergency plan provided | High | Leave vet and emergency contacts clearly, plus written permission and boundaries. citeturn0search1turn0search0 |
| Owner gives a big emotional goodbye | Medium | Keep departures calm and normal. A quick “see you later” is usually enough. |
| The owner gives a big emotional goodbye | Medium to High | Write them down, including what helps (distance, treats, quieter routes). |
Recommended essentials that can help
Whilst these links are affiliate links and I make a few pence at no extra cost to you, they are products I use on a regular basis or have used with my own dogs
- A double-ended training lead (Affiliate link)
Best for: dogs who need flexible lead length and calm control.
Helps with: keeping your dog close on busy pavements, then giving a bit more space in quieter areas.
Caution: Make sure your sitter knows how to use it before you leave. - A long line for decompression walks (Affiliate link)
Best for: dogs who settle better when they can sniff and move at their own pace.
Helps with: calmer woodland or park walks where off-lead isn’t sensible.
Caution: long lines need good handling to avoid tangles. - A lick mat or food enrichment mat (Affiliate link)
Best for: dogs who struggle to settle when routines change.
Helps with: giving your sitter a calm “settle activity” at predictable times.
Caution: keep it simple and only use foods your dog already tolerates.
If your dog needs a calmer walking setup while someone else is handling them, my Reactive Dog Walking Kit list may be a good starting point
What I’d do in real life
If you told me today that you’re going away in three weeks and your dog has never had a sitter, I’d do three things.
First, I’d choose the right kind of care. If your dog is nervous, reactive, or not keen on strangers, I’d lean towards staying at home with a sitter rather than moving them. It’s usually easier for a dog to cope with one new person than a whole new environment.
Second, I’d build predictable introductions. I’d ask the sitter to arrive at the same time each time, keep their energy low, and repeat the same entry routine. If a dog learns “this person comes in calmly, nothing scary happens, and then life goes on”, they usually soften a lot faster.
Third, I’d practise a small “real sit” before the actual trip. Even a 60–90 minute trial where you go out for a walk or do the weekly shop can be enough to reveal problems you can fix early.
If your dog walks better on quiet paths, I’d tell the sitter that. If your dog needs distance from other dogs, I’d map out two calmer routes, maybe in and around Coldfall Woods or quieter parts of Finchley, depending on what your dog can manage.
Most issues I see with sitters aren’t caused by the sitter being “bad”. They’re caused by unclear routines, rushed introductions, and owners assuming their dog will just cope.
If your dog struggles with being left
Some dogs don’t just “miss you”. They panic.
True separation problems are not solved by swapping people. They need a plan, often involving your vet and a qualified behaviour professional.
If your dog shows signs like persistent distress, self-injury attempts, or extreme destruction that starts as soon as you leave, treat it as a welfare issue, not a training issue. Speak to your vet.
In the meantime, a sitter who can keep things calm and predictable can still be part of the support, but it shouldn’t be the only strategy.
If you want help setting things up
If you’re in Finchley or nearby and you want support with calm routines, one-to-one walking, or in-home care while you’re away, you’re welcome to get in touch.
- For in-home care while you’re away:
- For a broader overview of staying at home care:
- For calmer one-to-one walks that follow your dog’s pace:
Updated April 2026.
FAQ
If you can, aim for at least two short visits before the real sit. Nervous dogs often do better with three or four.
If your dog is comfortable with it, yes. A short familiar walk with you present can help your dog feel safer with the sitter.
Yes. Even friendly dogs can get confused when you leave, and a new person stays. A short intro visit reduces surprises.
A written routine, food instructions, emergency contacts, vet details, any medication instructions, and a map of your dog’s usual walking routes. This article on the home owners check list is worth reading
Always. It’s not “being difficult”. It’s helping someone keep your dog safe and settled, and it prevents problems.
You may also like to read some of my other practical pet care guides
